OverHeard -- Three Wishes

overheard my husband and his friend speaking I wanted an Economist in kitchen, artist in home and devil in bed. All I got is, ARTIST in kitchen, DEVIL in home and ECONOMIST in bed

 

Bye Daddy

During the Persian Gulf War, I was assigned to go to Saudi Arabia. As I was saying good-bye to my family, my three-year-old son, Christopher, was holding on to my leg and pleading with me not to leave. “No, Daddy, please don’t go!” he kept repeating. We were beginning to make a scene when my wife, desperate to calm him, said, “Let Daddy go and I’ll take you to get […]

 

Safety Award - Reporting Fires

We are a bunch of scientist at an arms factory are are involved in testing a new kind of flare for the army. In the past three weeks, atleast half a dozen fires broke out during the tests due to faulty flares. The irony of the situation is, I am going to get a medal next week, for being most vigilant in reporting fires

 

There Goes My Sarcasm

I hired a new CEO who is from the navy. I always got irritated that he is late to work though he is a veteran. I thought I would use a little sarcasm and one day asked him, “John, what is the first thing, officers of navy say, when you arrive late to work?” “Good Morning General” *There goes my sarcasm*

 

Can You Balance a Apple On your nose??

The other day, I was at a school explaining kindergarten kids what life of police in the town was. I was trying to motivate and instill patriotism in them. I really thought I did the job well and when I asked the students for questions the only questions hurled at me was   “Police, can you balance a apple on your nose”?   Looks like My explanation SUCKED ..

 

My Dad is In Navy

Having passed the enlistment physical, Jon was asked by the doctor, “Why do you want to join the Navy, son?” “My father said it’d be a good idea, Sir.” “Oh? And what does your father do?” “He’s in the Army, Sir.”

 

Oh no..money problems.

So I borrowed a lot of money lately. Close to $1000 total and still I have no job..so I sell and sell to make money and its not enough and it all goes to it. I owe $400 by the 30th this month..where will I get that?

 

Feel weird in Walmart

Every time I go to Walmart alone I feel depressed and annoyed and the people there seem rude. The last time I went there the cashier had a huge attitude. I gave her the wrong amount of cash and she went off on me. I just stood there and stared until her coworker came and switched with here..seriously wtf.

 

I don't get people..

I’m a nice person..but people, well some people say otherwise even though they are the bad guy in every scenario. I do what I can for other people, but I;m not perfect. There is this person who I will not name, he accuse me constantly of being a bad person and even evil. Why? Not sure. He makes fun of me, steals from me and talks about me behind my […]

 

Some friend..

I had this friend who was my best friend for 8 years..then she threw me away like I was garbage. All of a sudden she talks to me again, but only for a favor. But, she told me when she found a job she’d tell me and would help me but I heard it from her sister..What makes me mad is how people really do change, especially when they know […]